see, i considered that, but the lorazepam, even if I cut it in half, really fucks me up, and last time my anxiety kicked my ass bad enough to take it while I needed to stay awake, my shit just went from anxiety to depression, which is not an improvement. I can swing one or two drinks and still be way more functional than on the lor. If I can hold out til bedtime, then the lorazepam is a good idea, but I need to manage this awake, so I poured bourbon in the tea, turned on a cartoon for insomnia baby, and I am just breathing and sipping for a few minutes.
I realize that self medicating with alcohol is probably not plan A,like it used to be, but all things considered, I am going with it tonight.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2009-11-24 08:18 am (UTC)I realize that self medicating with alcohol is probably not plan A,like it used to be, but all things considered, I am going with it tonight.
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Date: 2009-11-24 08:58 am (UTC)Lorazepam would knock me out at first, but after awhile I could easily stay awake while on it.
Alcohol, otoh, could and did enhance my panic attacks occasionally. :(