maevele | How my Worst Case Scenario Brain just fucked me all up

For set up, everything today has sucked out loud, except for like an hour or two I spent in a hammock. Otherwise I have been a ball of fuck you, and everyone around me has been an assface too, so I hate 93.6 percent of the fucking world.

So, as you know bob, I have this regular writing gig thing. And I push my deadlines all the time, am always convinced I'm about to get fired. this week my boss gave me extra work, but warned me that if I didn't make deadline, she was going to have to cut me back on assignments, and that's totally fair, I'll bust ass to get shit done. And then I was busy the day she sent out the assignments, which she does by posting a shared document with everyone who writes for them, and we put our names down next to the ones we're gonna do, and I decided to wait to claim mine once I had time to seriously work for a while, so didn't mark them as mine. Took a disco nap tonight to try to ease my hatred, woke up ready to work, loaded the list of assignments and there are none on there that haven't been claimed.

I pretty much immediately determine that this means I have been fired for not picking my posts fast enough and she gave all my work to another person. I email her, but it's late, and she isn't around to tell me whether I have been sacked. So I freak the fuck right on out for half an hour, start brainstorming other work options, cry and rage at myself, panic, you know, like you do.

Then, I look at the overall list of documents, and lo and motherfucking behold, I realize she had also recently updated the last most recent list of posts.

Mine were on that one.

I am not fired.

I am just really fucking stupid.