I really fucked up

[maevele]

by conflating men with 'peen' in my post about the manthology, and i hurt people i care about, and unthinkingly went with some transphobic shit.

and I'm really fucking sorry, and thanks to those who pointed out how i fucked up. I'm going to take some time to think about how I was an asshole. I thought I knew better, and obviously I don't, so i need to work on that.

Comments

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

I think you are a smart, thinking person and we all have said/done things that we just weren't thinking about clearly.

I think none of us are all done and all clueful and we all just have to keep learning new stuff, which may hurt others and/or ourselves, but it's better than just sitting back and politely not engaging and never learning anything.

I have said/done stupid, faily shit and I assume I will continue to do so, because I am white, and hetero, and cis, and (now) middle-class. I think it comes with the territory, and there's nothing we can do but just keep trying.

[yagathai.livejournal.com]

You know, the penis is a fundamentally male symbol. In fact, it is the fundamentally male symbol. You cannot get any more male symbol than the weenis.

Yes, people of indeterminate or transitioning gender can have one and not be "male" per se, but I cannot see how invoking the penis as a general symbol for all maledom can be construed as offensive. FFS, it's THE PENIS.

[nmdrkangl.livejournal.com]

I've seen the weenis, and I'm not happy!

[estrobutch.livejournal.com]

The penis is a fundamentally male symbol in a fundamentally cissupremacist world. thanks for reminding us asshole.

Seconded

[voz-latina.livejournal.com]

Especially now that the size of the playground for the cissupremacists to play has not increased by one LJ post.

This is why sci fi has diversity issues. Seriously.

[yagathai.livejournal.com]

Listen, I'm not saying that a penis does or does not define an individual's gender identity, but trying to argue that it's wrong or bigoted to construct the phallus as a fundamentally male symbol is completely at odds with reality.

[estrobutch.livejournal.com]

your not listening or your a fucking worm trying to wriggle out of being an ass. penis =/= phallus.

stop being a jackass or keep being a jackass but stfu.

[estrobutch.livejournal.com]

well you mine as well of said it to your shoe then

[maevele.livejournal.com]

but in the context i used it, it was ciscentric as fuck. and fell into a pretty standard feminist pattern of equating genitals with privileged status, in a kinda metaphorical/symblic way, which leads in like one easy step to the totally not metaphorical using of that equating that gets use to justify excluding trans women from feminist's women only spaces. and since that's not somehting i want to go along with and promote, it was fucked up.

[tinyrevolution.livejournal.com]

And this is the problem with free education. I taught you something and you used it to be a better cis supremist.

[maevele.livejournal.com]

no. let's not be trying to defend my ciscentric bullshit, ok?
it was offensive. not all penises belong to men, not all men have penises, and i knew that and fucked up anyway.

[kynn.livejournal.com]

...

Why does someone go "[this thing] I did was fucked up," and you reply with "[more of this thing], and it's not fucked up!"

What the hell is wrong with you?

[kynn.livejournal.com]

Oh, wait, you're the kind of fucked-in-the-head person who thinks that not buying the Mammoth Book Of White Men Who Are The Only People Who Write Good Science Fiction is some kind of reverse discrimination that is unfairly judging a book based on the gender and race of the authors.

I.e., you have shit for brains.

Gotcha.

[tinyrevolution.livejournal.com]

penis phallus

[omnivorously.livejournal.com]

Yes, people of indeterminate or transitioning gender can have one and not be "male" per se

People of completely determined and post-transition gender can and do have one, too. Yeesh. Don't you know anything about transitioning?

*waits to see if you admit you know jackshit, or if you try to backpedal*

[stoneself.livejournal.com]

cisprivilege - learn what it's about before writing anything further