![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maevele
locals, We're looking to do a csa this year, and we're trying to work out which ones are the best deals. recs/warnings?
In mental health news, I am now on my third day of 75% decaf. My period started this morning. usually, the last two days before, and first two of, are the days I am most likely to want to rip my skin off and hide under the bed. I went out and was social last night and yesterday, with people who also have kids of various rowdy/loud levels, and my kids got all spun out as they do. normally, the socializing, spun kids, and pms would have caused me to be an absolute wreck. I was cool. I am still cool today, whereas normally if i get through something that sets me off, i pay for it the next day.
It was the fucking coffee. I'm still trying to figure out how to stay awake, and maybe I'm going to need to adjust the caffiene levels so as to get that balance of awake but cool, but holy shit, I'm cool.
I spent years and years drinking major aounts of coffee trying to compensate for my depression. I was so low energy that drinking coffee was my only way to compensate. I thought, honest to god, that i could not stay mentally healthy without the coffee. but once I got on enough meds, the coffee was way too much for me, I guess. And with th insomniac baby from hell, i was drinking even more coffee, thinkigng that the lack of sleep was the major reason I was so close to losin it at all times, and If I could just get awake... fuck. I really had been fucking myself up bad for a long time here.
i am pretty pissed that when I presented with anxiety, no one asked about the coffee.
In mental health news, I am now on my third day of 75% decaf. My period started this morning. usually, the last two days before, and first two of, are the days I am most likely to want to rip my skin off and hide under the bed. I went out and was social last night and yesterday, with people who also have kids of various rowdy/loud levels, and my kids got all spun out as they do. normally, the socializing, spun kids, and pms would have caused me to be an absolute wreck. I was cool. I am still cool today, whereas normally if i get through something that sets me off, i pay for it the next day.
It was the fucking coffee. I'm still trying to figure out how to stay awake, and maybe I'm going to need to adjust the caffiene levels so as to get that balance of awake but cool, but holy shit, I'm cool.
I spent years and years drinking major aounts of coffee trying to compensate for my depression. I was so low energy that drinking coffee was my only way to compensate. I thought, honest to god, that i could not stay mentally healthy without the coffee. but once I got on enough meds, the coffee was way too much for me, I guess. And with th insomniac baby from hell, i was drinking even more coffee, thinkigng that the lack of sleep was the major reason I was so close to losin it at all times, and If I could just get awake... fuck. I really had been fucking myself up bad for a long time here.
i am pretty pissed that when I presented with anxiety, no one asked about the coffee.
