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maevele
okay, so, I am so white as to be pasty, and not so cocky as to think my perspective on racism needs to be heard when so many POC are trying to speak. So, I'm going to stick with white privilege, at least for today. there are great link roundups about IBARW http://community.livejournal.com/ibarw/ which you should read before wasting your time reading my little whitegirl thoughts.
Anyhow, it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I was privileged too. I grew up pretty damn poor, in a predominantly black and latino neighborhood, and the school I went to bussed in rich white kids. (rich from my POV, I realize now they were at best middle class) and at the time all I could see was that I was not included in any of the social groups in my neighborhood, other white kids had it better than me, and in my neighborhood, the black kids seemed to have more status than I did, to the point where there was teasing about me being the white girl. Looking back, I see how twisted my perceptions were. Yeah, I may have been picked on for being a white girl, but that was more of a defense mechanism on the part of the neighborhood kids than racism or privilege.
As I grew up, I started looking at my childhood differently. I recognize that the way I was treated in school, especially before they started bussing in white kids, had little to do with my academic abilities or sparkling personality, and more to do with being the quiet little white girl. No wonder the other kids in my neighborhood weren't fond of me. They could see what I couldn't, that I was getting a big fucking load of privilege from the teachers administrators, and local businesses even. I'll continue more next time the kids allow.
Anyhow, it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I was privileged too. I grew up pretty damn poor, in a predominantly black and latino neighborhood, and the school I went to bussed in rich white kids. (rich from my POV, I realize now they were at best middle class) and at the time all I could see was that I was not included in any of the social groups in my neighborhood, other white kids had it better than me, and in my neighborhood, the black kids seemed to have more status than I did, to the point where there was teasing about me being the white girl. Looking back, I see how twisted my perceptions were. Yeah, I may have been picked on for being a white girl, but that was more of a defense mechanism on the part of the neighborhood kids than racism or privilege.
As I grew up, I started looking at my childhood differently. I recognize that the way I was treated in school, especially before they started bussing in white kids, had little to do with my academic abilities or sparkling personality, and more to do with being the quiet little white girl. No wonder the other kids in my neighborhood weren't fond of me. They could see what I couldn't, that I was getting a big fucking load of privilege from the teachers administrators, and local businesses even. I'll continue more next time the kids allow.
