fuck money

[maevele]

I'm, um, 700 dollars short on december's fucking rent yet once my check gets here. My mom is basically splitting her xmas money with me, she pays, I shop, we split who gives what to the kids, so christmas is okay, but I don't have the fucking rent because I had to pay the power bill last month. I can't do this. I've been trying not to have a breakdown over it, but that shit is slipping now. I can not get caught up, even with all of the help people have given. What I get at tax time is going to all go to pay what I'll be short on rent through the spring, so I won't be able to put anything aside for moving money. I fucking refuse to lose my shit over money, but I have never been this fucked for this long before, with the kids depending on me, so it's getting harder and harder to not get depressed over it. I just get further behind every month.

I'd still rather be scared about money than scared about him though, so it'll all be okay.

Comments

[maevele]

yeah, I usually do most of her shopping anyway because she works and has no car, and I know what the kids want and have time to shop. And since I do the actual shopping and wrapping, I get credit for giving them some of the stuff this year. Their dad is getting them stuff too, since he isn't fucking broke, so they'll still do fine for the holidays.